Archive for the 'News' Category

“The Hiltons” by amit

According to the UK version of Yahoo! News, famous-for-being-famous Paris Hilton and her sister Nicky are in the works for a TV cartoon series about their wild lives and accompanying high jinks. The show hopes to be in the style of “The Simpsons” except with extra raunchiness and maybe a bit of venereal disease. C&V discovered the animated show will combine classic Hanna-Barbera cartoon characters with the Hiltons (and Tinkerbell). We can’t wait to take a stroll down memory lane with some childhood favs and the modern day madams. Luckily the Korean animation studio behind the show sent us some screen shots of a few upcoming episodes. Let’s stroll…

In episode 2, “Fred & Barney’s Ride,” the Bedrock buddies try and pick up Paris Hilton for $14 dino-dollars. Let’s hope Wilma and Betty don’t find out!

Episode 4 is sure to be a classic. In the show titled “Elroy & The ‘Sitter” the young and vulnerable member of the Jetsons and his faithful dog, Astro, get upset over George and Jane’s decision not to leave them home alone. Then they discover Nicky Hilton is the babysitter. Let’s just say everyone in this picture “grew up” except the alien doll.

The ninth installment intros Tom & Jerry teaming up after years of hatred. The cat and mouse duo apparently get so annoyed at Paris’ dog, Tinkerbell, and scheme to attack her with a blunt object and a bomb.

Everyone remembers Jonny Quest and his turban-toting friend, Hadji. In the season finale of “The Hiltons” Jonny and his friends discover a ransacked room full of show tunes DVDs. Sadly, that evening was Paris’ loneliest…

posted on 6:27 pm 03/22/2006
News, TV | Comments (1) | Permalink |

“Trapped in a Closet” Comes Out by amit

One of the best episodes of “South Park” to date has caused quite a stir from the lone fan all the way to Lord Xenu himself (or herself). If you have yet to see the episode, “Trapped in a Closet”, click below to watch the full episode before reading on (be sure to watch the credits too).

C&V is all about giving you the full coverage behind the bedlam caused by “Trapped in a Closet”, so pay attention. First off, the voice of Chef, Isaac Hayes, quit because “he [could] no longer stomach its take on religion.” Apparently the singer of “Chocolate Salty Balls” lacked the appetite for Matt Stone and Trey Parker making light of his oh-so-true religion Scientology and walked away. Stone and Parker put fans of “South Park” at ease by adding the actual character of Chef will linger despite Hayes departure. Continuing on…

“South Park” begins its 10th season tomorrow at 10/9c. In order to hype the animated show’s return Comedy Central began airing old episodes from the large catalogue of ingenious material. That’s when the sh** hit the fan. It’s rumored Tom Cruise refused to promote his new Paramount Picture, Mission Impossible III, if the above episode was re-aired. Since Paramount wants to make $300 million with the third installment and owns Viacom which owns Comedy Central, the comedy cable network allegedly bent over backwards and cancelled the show’s re-run. The “South Park” creators retorted,

“So, Scientology, you have won THIS battle, but the million-year war for Earth has just begun. Temporarily anozinizing our episode will NOT stop us from keeping Thetans forever trapped in your pitiful man-bodies. Curses and drat! You have obstructed us for now, but your feeble bid to save humanity will fail! Hail Xenu!!!”

Stone and Parker will now devote all their efforts to patronizing Tom Cruise and his faux religion for their upcoming 10th season. Since it only takes six days to write and produce a single episode, C&V believes the entire season will be devoted to non-stop Scientology/Cruise/Travolta/L. Ron-bashing. Set your TiVo’s or tune in to Comedy Central on Wednesdays 10/9c.

posted on 7:31 pm 03/21/2006
News, TV | Comments (0) | Permalink |

Exclusive: Hasselhoff Beats Wife! by dan

The AP just called. David Hasselhoff beats his wife. The wife, actress Pamela Bach, who is 11 years younger than the woman beating tyrant, filed suit in L.A. superior court last Monday. And I’ll bet 10 bucks a divorce waits in the wings. But hey, that’s just my opinion and no one really cares about that. I think we all know whose opinion matters here. Kit, the talking car from Knight Rider (movie in the works?).

“Say It Isn’t So, Michael.” - Kit

This isn’t the first time Mr. Wife Beating himself, David Hasselhoff, has appeared on our site. Perhaps you remember his shit-tastic music video for “Hooked on a feeling.” Or maybe you remember those Pepsi ads where he’s humping a giant exploding bottle of soda. What makes someone go so crazy? Join us as we find out…

Hasselhoff does a puppy or two

[more...]

posted on 3:50 am 03/12/2006
News, TV | Comments (2) | Permalink |